and

he wants to forget me.

and he wants me to forget him.

i think.

my words are just mediocre.

no need to feel for them.

or be for them.

or live for them.

you can change your name.
your age.

who you are.


but i will always be the same.

much love.

the microphones "i felt your shape"

I thought I felt your shape but I was wrong
Really all I felt was falsely strong
I held on tight and closed my eyes
It was dumb I had no sense of your size

It was dumb to hold so tight
But last night
On the birthday in the kitchen
My grip was loose my eyes were open

I felt your shape and heard you breathing
I felt the rise and fall of your chest
I felt your fall
Your winter snows
Your gusty blow
Your lava flow
I felt it all
Your starry night
Your lack of light
With limp arms I can feel most of you

I hung around your neck independently
And my loss was overwhelmed
By this new depth I don’t think I ever felt

But I don’t know
The nights are cold
And I remember warmth
I could have sworn I wasn’t alone

history

i once had this friend.
his name was glenn.

and although he wasn't really real--
his words never fully giving truth--
he still made this strange impact on me.

i find myself from time to time thinking about him.
things he said.

he had this way with words.
could make anything amazing.

his power was with words i guess.

i decided to look for him online last night.

he's barely 17 apparently.
not the age i was told.

but who cares? it's just an age.

anyway.

i don't exist to him anymore.
maybe i never did.

but thats okay.

because he did in fact exist to me.
_____



it is dynamic.

standing in the crowded arena of life
the cackling of those near
hustle. bustle. crowded. dirty.
she likes it here.
the world passes, a constant ebb and flow of humans.
but she is still, waiting.
patiently.
shifting weight from one leg to the other,
she looks up at the stranger standing in front of her--
his face inches from engulfing hers.
his arms strong.
his height towering over hers.
his spine bends
reclining towards her soft, dewy skin
his lips meeting her ear.

"you are. just are."
she chuckles, bites her plump bottom lip and gazes in to his eyes intensly. sighing lazily she whispers, "but maybe i want to be you."
he smiles. "oh but you are all of me. and everyone i see and meet. that is why you just... are."
she shrugs, "oh well," and walks off, casting no look behind to find his reaction.

she's been ready for the end for some time now.
she knows she will never be alone.





but is it worth it to be without you?

history of silence

people are funny, you know.


very very funny.


i wish i could play sl right now.

i miss rping at the den.

like woah.